Saturday, April 18, 2015

One Of The Best Parts Of Getting Older

[because every second we are a little older] is being able to look back and think / say / feel:  "I *did* that.  Like a BOSS!  AND I have the scars to prove it."

Hopefully, the positive 'did's outweigh the not so positive ones, but many times, that early morning stretch of gratitude at waking up not dead for another solar rotation is pretty flipping great.  Sprinkle in a few head shaking, knee slapping, surprise your bad self with all out belly laughs followed by a nap or five of cat level expertise and booooom, boo: you have yourself a sweet sustainable setup.

You know, like a BOSS.

Friday, April 17, 2015

Funny How Time Passes

11 years ago today, right about now, actually, I, with all of my belongings packed into a small U-Haul, crossed the beautiful Bay Bridge.  I don't know how long I planned to stay.  I had no idea what I was getting myself into, but, as ever, I was ready for a challenge.  It still feels like I have no idea what I'm getting into every day that I get out of bed and some days more so than others.  Some days, I wonder how I managed to even have a enough of a non-noodled noggin to even contemplate this stuff. 

Funny how life happens!

Sunday, April 12, 2015

Points of Note

Two little tipping point things happened this week:

1] For the umpteenth time, I walked past an advert for Cadillac quoting Abigail Adams who is declaring that "a calm is not desirable in any situation in life." [I, for one, would prefer that my neurosurgeon be calm. Call me crazy, but there it is.]

2] At least four times in recent days, a post was included in my feed about drinking coffee, reading books, and being happy followed with many "amens" declaring that if you were doing the first two, obviously, the third would be the result.

My point of discomfort comes from how easily it is to disguise marginalization and also elitism as validation. The ironies on both sides abound.

Coffee + reading = happiness? I love great stories. I love reading. I love being happy. I once loved coffee. In the last several years, coffee has become the new niche non-alcoholic varietal based area of specialty for many. A new arena for highly discerning palates. It's quite status based and driven by the coolness factor here in SF, as I'm sure it is in many other places. It's a bit wearying when one simply wants a cuppa joe. That said, even decaf coffee now often makes me queasy and if I'm stressed and / or underslept, it can trigger a seizure. [Another upvote for the attractiveness of calm.] I also love reading and books and gathering knowledge in general, but sometimes my body aches to move and feel muscle burn. I want actual interaction, whether to vent, share, listen, laugh, and hopefully, all of those at length and at different, unplanned intersections. 

Sometimes, I just want to be quiet with someone and do nothing at all but stare at clouds or garden or drive or walk. Or attempt to create something lovely together that fails spectacularly and collapse in bend over, tear inducing laughter, snorts and whoops included...then have an iced tea or a beer or a glass of cheap wine. Smile and savor the warmth of the moment. Those moments are no less overflowing with joy and happiness. They are full of serendipity and wonder that cannot be captured in a perfectly posed Pinterest tile or an advert. And nothing against that [because I deeply appreciate the production talent that goes into crafting eye catching images, but life and joy are often messy, perfectly imperfect moments that weave themselves together to become that beautiful warp and woof of a life well lived...much like your favorite pair of jeans, jandals, and threadbare t-shirt.

Still, as much as I want to celebrate my everchanging moments of joy, I do hesitate at the "obviously" statement. I simply find it so exclusionary.

I think it's great that people love their coffee and their reading and have found it to be an automatic path to happiness. Clearly, certain ad campaigns think you need to be in a constant state of chaos and disarray in order to have achieved a measure of accomplishment that will afford you a luxury car that resembles a glossy, low rider, repurposed tank. [No judgment on that esthetic, but it does seem sort of over the top unless you actually require a sassy repurposed tank for safety and survival.] 

Is it not inconceivable to think that there is more to it than just a single unilateral declarative statement?

As much as you may want to embrace your passion and declare it as your personal peak experience, perhaps be careful before declaring it as THE peak experience. A deaf person's life is no less extraordinary because they have yet to auditorily experience a symphony...nor is a hike with your loved ones in hushed silence, or watching a friend or family member score the goal, hit their mark, reach a personal best in the midst of shouts of enthusiasm. Here is happiness. Here is joy. It takes many forms.

Often, joy can be an unexpected present instead of the result of a designated or fixed calculation of the future. I wonder how much more fulfilling moments could be if we weren't constantly told what the "obvious" parameters are expected to be.
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Wednesday, April 08, 2015

Nothing Erudite

But it's really amazing how wonderful life can be when one doesn't feel as though they are in a constant state of crisis.

Boo to the YAH.

Saturday, April 04, 2015

LDRs Can Be Tough [TMB]

Just sayin'...but I am also just sayin'.

'Nuff said.

A Story of Sweet Serendipity: Matt and Bro O

This is truly one of the best reads I've had in ages. While a number of people have pointed out that it could have been an April Fool's joke, it would have to have been an impressively elaborate [Matt Stopera, editor at Buzzfeed, began posting about this on BF in February] and expensive [at least by my calculations, but then I suppose that in the world of Photoshop and CGI, anything is possible.]  I, however, am inclined to believe it to be authentic.

It's an unusually long read, by current internet Twitter standards, but it is also incredibly gratifying and moving.  SO much so that I was sad to see it come to an end so quickly; as one friend of mine put it, I wanted to be and sort felt as though I was sort of their friend, too.  It's like the best aspects of a great boook that you never want to put down. 

The level of genuine affection that these two individuals have created is not only wonderful, but it also highlights everything what is so very right about the intarwebs, the power of connectivity, and how easy it is for an inconvenience [frequently referred to as a 'FIrst World Problem'] to become a life changing event that positively impacts so many people and on such a beautiful and human level.

I honestly hope you take a few minutes to enjoy the evolving story of Matt and Bro O. [It's really "Bro Orange", but like any good story, my Inner Editor quick nick-nicknamed him "Bro O".]  In the end, I hope this story is not short, but is a long story that winds its way through each of their lives.